Sex toys for men: Is it still a taboo?

Read about the author Samantha Evans

Women who used sex toys were once deemed as lonely or sexually deviant, but nowadays the use of such products by women is socially acceptable. The stigma for men who show an interest is slowly changing as more men come to realise the benefits of using a male sex toy.

As a sex toy retailer, I know that many couples enjoy using sex toys, often buying “his and her” sex toys or couples’ toys to share. We have many customers who buy sex toys when penetrative sex is not longer possible but they still want to enjoy sexual intimacy and pleasure together.

Couples who use sex toys together can improve their sexual relationship. Using a sex toy is a fun way to spice up your relationship whilst boosting your intimacy and sexual pleasure. Many people in long term relationships incorporate sex toys into their sex life to keep the passion alive too.

Personally I find it odd that even amongst women who own cupboards full of sex toys, I have spoken to those who say they would be horrified if they found out their partner was using a sex toy for their own pleasure. While a woman could happily mention she uses a vibrator to her friends, a man who mentions that he uses a sex toy to his mates is more likely to be ridiculed rather than asked for a product.
recommendation. Perhaps many consider that a man has his hand for pleasuring but so do women!

The image of male sex toys that frequently springs to mind for many people is the blow­up doll peeking out from Del­Boy Trotter’s Robin Reliant, whereas the reality is that male sex toys are now every bit as innovative and varied as toys for women.

Male sex toys have changed so much in the last 10 years with innovation from many manufacturers looking to enhance male sexual pleasure in whatever way they can.

Male sex toy sales have risen by 1,000 per cent in the past 10 years. The best ­selling sex toy is the Fleshlight, a realistic-looking vagina in a container designed to look like a torch, which now has a whole range of accessories such as shower mounts and sleeve warmers to enhance the experience – there’s even an attachment for your iPad.

In 2014 FHM conducted an online male sex toy debate of 5,000 men to find out their views about buying male sex toys and found:

• 51 per cent of the men own a sex toy with cock rings being the most popular toy (30 per cent) followed in popularity by Fleshlight, prostate massagers, penis pumps and stamina rings.

• 78 per cent of the men said that they would consider buying a sex toy for solo use. 22 per cent said “no way”.

• 70 per cent suggested that they should be allowed to buy a male sex toy without embarrassment.

• 69 per cent would be happy to let their partner use a male sex toy on them.

• 60 per cent of the men who replied said they had use a female sex toy on their partner and had enjoyed the experience.

• Only 4 per cent said it was weird.

So why do so many see the use of sex toys by women as empowering, but ridicule men who make the same choice? Perhaps if women who weren’t keen on their partners using them understood that they can make men better lovers they would be less likely to be upset; a product such at the Fleshlight Stamina Training Unit can help men increase their staying power, a common complaint from some women that their partner doesn’t last long enough for them to enjoy an orgasm too.

As well as customers just seeking to do something a little different in their sex lives, we have had customers wanting help with ED especially after prostate surgery (which is very common). These customers often buy a vibrator for their wives too – it means they can still share intimacy even if coital sex isn’t possible.

Female customers often buy a toy for themselves and then come back and say “I loved my vibrator, so I thought I’d treat my husband”, or men return and say “I’d like something for me too”.

For someone who wants something approximating sex, a Fleshlight is a great choice.

For a different sensation when they want to experience a vibrator, the Pulse Solo Essential or Fun Factory Cobra. Or they could try an anal vibrator for prostate stimulation.

Benefits to Sexual Health

Studies conducted at Indiana University in USA in 2009 found that 45 per cent of men aged between 18­ and 65 years who use sex toys were more likely to participate in sexual health promoting behaviours such as testicular examination and male sexual health clinics.

They also scored highly on satisfaction levels of erectile dysfunction, intercourse satisfaction, orgasmic function and sexual desire.

The benefits of orgasm are huge for both physical and mental well­being, and ­recent research from Harvard Medical School has found that regular orgasms can reduce the risk of developing prostate cancer by 22 per cent, so anything that adds or enables an orgasm can only be a good thing.

Healthcare Professionals recommend The Use Of Male Sex Toys

Just as many healthcare professionals are recommending using a vibrator to women who experience sexual issues, more are recommending the use of male sex toys in combination with traditional medical treatment to improve sexual pleasure, sensation and erectile function.

Dr Michael Werner MD, a urologist and specialist in sexual dysfunction recommends sex toys as a vital part of erectile dysfunction (ED) treatment, including: penis pumps, constriction bands (cock rings), and vibrators for use on the penis.

So if you are thinking about trying a male sex toy or want to buy one for your partner, consider all the sexual health and pleasure benefits they can offer. However , have a chat with your partner first before pulling an anal sex toy out of your bag to find out what they want to try, rather than choosing a sex toy you think they want to try!