Back to Basics

Mr Divine is a techno nut. I don’t mind, it keeps him happy and I like some gadgets too. The lovely mixer that takes all the work out of bread-making, my Ereader that I can take on holiday with dozens of novels on it and won’t take me over my baggage allowance… I’ve got a few high tech bits in my toy box too and it is nice to have something to play with when the need arises, so to speak. I do appreciate the odd gadget but Mr Divine takes it to the extreme.

He has a thingy for everything. He’s got several digital photo frames, an ice crusher, a high tech coffee machine, some kind of geek watch that monitors… well, everything I think, every game console known to man (and woman) and he only ever uses one of the damn things. Can I throw away the old ones though? Noooo, they’ll be worth something one day, apparently. Gadgets, he loves ‘em.

Sometimes though, you don’t need a gadget: you’ve got the equipment you need to hand – literally. Your own two hands are powerful. You can use them for all sorts, not just pressing buttons. I like to get out in the garden sometimes and pull up weeds; you can only really do that with your hands and pastry is always best made by hand so you can feel its consistency as you go along. They are useful tools and you can take them anywhere without arousing suspicion.

I use my hands a lot… yes, Diary, I’m getting sexual again. I love the simplicity of using what I’ve got to satisfy my needs there and then. Yes, sometimes nothing but a long, hard… erm, Mr Divine will do the job – but sometimes when the pressure has built and I just need to let off steam, my fingers work like a charm.

Especially at work. I know it’s a bit of a taboo subject and I suppose I don’t like to think about what my work colleagues might get up to in the toilets or in the storage cupboard when no one is looking but it is a fact of life. We all get horny and sometimes we’re at work when it happens. I think it’s better to have an orgasm and concentrate for the rest of the day than to stay frustrated and muck up a bunch of spreadsheets before you go home!

Using your own hand means you are in complete control – you can exert just the right pressure and motion to satisfy you. You don’t need to read a manual first, you don’t need any special safety equipment or batteries; you can just do it and let’s face it, sometimes you need to just do it. I know I don’t always want foreplay and fantasy with my orgasm, I just want that release of endorphins and ecstasy.

So today I am going to look after my fingers because they look after me. I’m going to clean them and lotion them and manicure them because they’ve been hard at work all week. So thank you, fingers, you bring me the ultimate in satisfaction. Even my sexiest sex toys would be nothing without you!