Creating an Intimacy Bag

Read about the author Samantha Evans

We help many people regain their sexual function and enjoy good sexual health, intimacy and pleasure who experience sexual health issues following cancer treatment, living with cancer, post childbirth, post hysterectomy, menopausal symptoms, genital skin conditions, vaginismus, vulvodynia or simply the ageing process.

Our advice includes using a good vaginal moisturiser, good sexual lubricants which are free from any irritating ingredients, suitable sex toys and our silky smooth silicone dilator kit, all of which can help people regain their sexual function and enjoy pleasurable sex in whatever way they want to or are able to.

Creating an intimacy bag is such a good idea to keep all your essential products together. People often feel that having to use medical dilators and a wide range of creams, moisturisers, lubricants, topical treatment and plastic dilators just to manage their vagina and vulva health condition or issue can feel really clinical and not the least bit sexual.

Popping them into a pretty drawstring bag, wash bag or large make up bag can help them feel more intimate and less clinical. The fabulous Dr Liz O’Riordan refers to having a bag of tricks in her excellent book about Breast Cancer.

So what could you include in your intimacy bag?

Sexual Lubricants

We know that using a good pH balanced sexual lubricant can transform your sexual pleasure, and we recommend SUTIL and YES lubricants. Being passionate about your intimate health and sexual pleasure we always advise people to avoid any products that contain glycerin, glycols, parabens, dyes, perfumes and glitter. Flavoured lubricants are great for oral sex, but we do not recommend them for any form of penetrative sex. If using products that have a warming or cooling effect proceed with caution as many can cause irritation, stinging or burning which is why we do not recommend them.

As with any intimate products, if it stings, burns, irritates or causes itching, wash off and put it in the bin.

SUTIL Luxe feels like no other lubricant I have ever tried, it is a water-based lubricant that feels like a silicone lubricant and also doubles up as a vaginal moisturiser. It is long-lasting, so doesn’t need reapplying like many water-based lubricants and a little goes a long way. It interacts with your own natural lubrication, making you feel really well lubricated, prolonging and increasing your sexual pleasure.

YES comes in a water based formulation and an oil based formulation which can be used together to create a double glide effect. Some people like the water based formulation as it is closest to your own natural lubrication, other people love the oil based formulation which is longer lasting and really nourishing to the tissues of the vulva, vagina and penis. Just remember any oil based product will destroy latex condoms.

Vaginal Moisturiser

Just as you moisturiser your face and body, you need to moisturise your vulva and vagina. It is important to use a good pH balanced vaginal moisturiser free from all the ingredients mentioned above. Please be aware that there are some products on prescription that do contain some of those ingredients so check with your GP what the ingredients are before they prescribe it.

SUTIL Luxe and YESVM are excellent vaginal moisturisers.

Vaginal Dilators

Vaginal dilators are a great way to help gently stretch the vagina. Traditionally, medical dilators are used to treat the above conditions but can be made from hard plastic which may feel uncomfortable against the delicate skin of the vaginal area.

Some people prefer to use medical dilators to treat their condition rather than a vibrator which they consider to be sexual. However, some prefer to use a vibrator which feels less clinical and more fun. Many people want to feel sexual again after undergoing months, if not years of medical treatment and surgical intervention, and for them, using a vibrator is a fun way to enjoy sexual pleasure and intimacy alone or with a partner.
Both medical dilators and vibrators can be used in conjunction with each other as they offer different experiences for many people. Medical dilators can help to stretch the tight tissues of the vagina whilst a vibrator can promote blood flow to the healing tissues and feel pleasurable too, especially on the clitoris.

The Inspire Dilator Kit offers 5 graduated dilators made from velvety soft silicone which are extremely flexible, unlike hard medical dilators and very gentle on the delicate skin of the vulva and vagina. The easy-to-use loop handle makes them comfortable to hold, and the gentle tapered shape and varied sizes allows you to increase the insertion size at a rate that is comfortable to you.

Slim Sex toys

You may wish to use your dilators with a sex toy or use a sex toy as an alternative to dilators. You can find our slim sex toys and the Inspire Dilator kit s in our health brochure we created in the NHS which is given out by many healthcare professionals. It contains:

• 6 slim vibrators designed for internal and external use

• Inspire Silicone Dilator Kit : consists of 5 different sized dilators

• 3 clitoral vibrators to help women who struggle to orgasm. Often surgical and medical interventions such as cancer treatment, medical conditions and the menopause can affect your libido, leading to decreased sexual sensation.

• Pelvic floor exercisers

• YES organic lubricant and vaginal moisturiser

If you’d prefer a non vibrating toy, our dildos come in a range of slim designs including Real Rock Ultra 15, a more realistic dildo or SportsSheets Skyn, Please and Flare.

Bullet vibrators are such a great way to regain your sexual confidence, so small in design and simple to use on your own or with a partner. Great for solo pleasure or use on a partner with a clitoris and penis and on nipples as that first step back into enjoying intimacy and pleasure.

Pebble vibrators are so pretty and no one will even know what it is!

Air pulse toys have changed clitoral stimulation for the better. They are not vibrators but use air pulse technology to gently tease and caress the clitoris, such a great way to get warmed up. LELO Sona 2 is so easy to hold and use, being waterproof you can even use it in the bath or shower. Curvy 1 Plus App combines air pulse tech with vibrations offering a completely different sexual sensation and is app controlled, so why not let your partner take control of your pleasure?

You may even want to slip an extra toy in your bag for a partner with a penis, vagina or clitoris, for anal play or just to share.

Your intimacy bag can be your fun bag, your way to regaining your sexual function and enjoying sexual intimacy and pleasure in whatever way you wish or are able to.